Posted by Matt Bush

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When you have been apart from someone for a while, it can be easy to forget some of the small things that make that person unique. After being away from the kids for the past few months (by far the longest I had ever gone without seeing them), it was interesting to see those things bubble back to the surface quickly. Here are a few things that I noticed that I can easily forget about when I am not around them:

  • The way Apolon tries to be “cool” and act like things do not bother him, but his smile gives away the fact that he completely loves the attention he gets from us.
  • How Malayika hangs back for a quite a while before she can no longer stand it and then is just always there, right next to you.
  • How you can tell how Woodly is doing simply by noticing how much time he spends at our house.
  • How Yolmenda is very shy and reserved…Until she isn’t (usually when she wants something or when she is standing up for someone else).
  • How worried Herbison was that we were not coming back, and how much he liked when we talked to Sophie on FaceTime and she kept asking for him.
  • How Fransline, while one of the oldest, still definitely acts like one of the youngest when it comes to how excited she gets about movies, presents, and spending time together.
  • The fact that Maekin definitely changed more than any other child there.

There are a lot of things like that, but these are the things that just came to mind. They came to mind because the other day Elijah did something that we call, “Pulling a Fefe.” Fedeline is one of our younger girls, and she is really funny. She is kind of shy, but she is also a little mischievous. 

Anyway, whenever we have something planned, no matter how big or small, Fedeline cannot stand it. She gets so excited that she starts to act out immediately and she almost always loses the reward we have planned. Let me give you an example.

Any time we plan a beach trip, all of the kids get really excited. Most of the kids act wonderfully for the rest of the week, and do anything that you ask them to do. They do not want to do anything that might put their beach trip in jeopardy…Except for Fedeline. She does the opposite.

She acts out, she talks back, she fights, and she just does pretty much anything possible to not be able to take part in the outing. It is uncanny. She just cannot control her emotions when she gets excited. In fact, almost every beach trip, we have to give her grace and allow her to come because she definitely did not earn her trip. The same thing happens if we plan a restaurant day, have the “ice cream man” come by, or even for Friday movie nights (she almost always has to sit out). 

So now, Jess and I call implosive behavior “Pulling a Fefe.” So this past Monday, on Elijah’s birthday, he started to get a little overly excited. Of course we understood it and he did not get in trouble for it because he is 3 and he was just really excited. But every time he did something, Jess and I looked at each other and said, “He’s pulling a Fefe.” And it just reminded me of how much I had missed seeing the kids.


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